It’s LindaOJ here again today, happy to be writing another TELUS Talks Business Blog post, and I have a few questions for you today about communication.

1. Did you know how you communicate can ultimately save you time and money?
2. Did you know people judge you by the way you communicate?

Communication is an integral part of our lives, from the minute we wake up until we go to bed we are communicating with family members, friends, business colleagues and customers. Some of these people may have relationships with us that span many years so have gotten used to the way we communicate, or don’t communicate. When it comes to customers it’s another matter.

As a small business owner myself I network at a lot of different events and this is where I learn a lot about communication.

One example is the networker who has just met me, introduces themselves to me, takes about 10 minutes sharing everything they do, what they sell and all the reasons why I should buy their product or service. I tend to go very quiet when this happens, listen and observe their body language. Some things I am looking for are:

• Comfortable and at ease when chatting with others, confidence when they speak about their business, knowledge about their products and services, but more importantly, a desire to find out more about me, their prospective customer.
• Are they using my name when they converse with me, or are they offering me the typical sale spiel which fits every size, budget, location etc.
• A chance to join the conversation, share some information about myself, often as not this is not possible as the person finishes their ‘elevator speech’ offers me a business card and moves on to the next person.

Communication is vital when networking, but the above examples are a great way to determine if you, the possible customer wants to take the next step and find out more about the products/service being offered you, or if you walk away. Ultimately when people communicate in a way that demonstrates it is all about them and the sale they want to make, their communication skills are not up to scratch and they lose more than they gain.

Emails are another great example of our how communication may lead to misunderstandings or no replies. It is very easy to fire off an email and fail to add the call to action. We might think that the reader knows what we want, but are they mind readers? If you don’t ask for a reply by return more often than not you will not receive a reply at all.

"We're at the point now where the challenge isn't how to communicate effectively with e-mail, it's ensuring that you spend your time on the  e-mail that matters most." - Bill Gates.

More of a concern for me with communication today is Twitter. I think 140 characters is a great idea and if you keep it simple you can communicate very well with fewer words. But, the problem arises for the people who do not understand Twitter and constantly want to sell, they take the short cut and communicate via direct message. So many businesses lose out because they cut to the chase with no run up communication and I find this rude. Twitter is a great way to build a relationship and take it from there.

I think I am a good communicator, but even I get it wrong. A few years ago I had left a message with the Mayor of Toronto and was I surprised when he phoned me back, or so I thought. This is how a telephone call ended up in a state of utter confusion and caused a lot of laughter from my family. The phone rang; I picked it up and stated who I was. The person speaking had an accent (as do I) and I asked who he was. My brain heard “It’s the Mayor”. I promptly went on to explain why I had contacted him, and I talk fast when I am excited. I told him how happy I was he had phoned me back and then I paused for breath. The guy sounded confused and kept on saying “It’s the Mayor” or so I thought. Eventually it came to light what he was saying was “It’s Damere” who was actually a friend of one of my sons. I think if my brainset had not been in the mode of “The Mayor” I might have thought twice before making an assumption, especially as I knew in the back of my mind that the Mayor of Toronto had a Canadian accent, which the person at the end of the phone obviously did not have.  I believe my thought process was so caught up on the challenge I wanted to share with the Mayor my listening skills disappeared and my communication suffered.

From Wikipedia:

Communication is the activity of conveying information. Communication has been derived from the Latin word "communis", meaning to share. Communication requires a sender, a message, and an intended recipient, although the receiver need not be present or aware of the sender's intent to communicate at the time of communication; thus communication can occur across vast distances in time and space. Communication requires that the communicating parties share an area of communicative commonality. The communication process is complete once the receiver has understood the message of the sender. Feedback is critical to effective communication between parties.

From the above meaning of the word Communication you will see the last line states “Feedback is critical to effective communication between parties”, if this does not happen challenges can arise.

Have you ever noticed how in a heated debate someone’s attitude might change, they could become aggressive or even feel threatened, this can alter the image someone has of a person. If you are in the business world you could be seen to be unfriendly, or untrustworthy, judged by your actions that follow communication.

Whether you are communicating by the written word or spoken word you should take time to think out the message you want to convey. It has been said that if you smile when you are speaking to someone via the phone they can tell you are in a happy frame of mind.

Texting is a popular way to communicate; some texts are sent with typos in them and spell something different than the intended message. Most of the time this is funny, but there have been occasions when this could cause problems.

Richard Branson, a man I admire very much is very much into communicating with people he works with. His monthly newsletter to employees offers details for Virgins future plans, plus how to contact Richard if they feel they need to. I believe this kind of communication stems from trust, and the trust offered from Richard to his employees encourages loyalty which is a wonderful asset in any organization.

I am a good communicator, but have had to tailor how much I communicate depending on the individual person I am dealing with at the moment in time. Not everyone needs, or wants, all the information. I still have challenges when I am dealing with lack of communication, but tend to deal with each person differently. Where my business is concerned I do have my list of how I want employees to communicate with me and what kind of time frame. Knowing my expectations leads to less confusion and challenges long term. When I feel communication is not forthcoming and it should be I have to step back and review the situation, rather than act on my emotions. Again the situation is determined on the person I am communicating with, and it took me a long time to learn this.

"We never listen when we are eager to speak."
- François de La Rochefoucauld

Linda Ockwell-Jenner is a President of Motivational Steps and Co-Founder of the Small Business Community Network (SBCN) based in Waterloo Region. Find out more about Linda at www.motivationalsteps.com and www.sbcncanada.org